Casting Joe Vampire The Movie: A Compare and contrast

So forever and a day ago, I read the author of Joe Vampire Steven Luna's take on who he'd cast in the movie of his book, if ever it was to get cast. I think that post is what intrigued me enough to buy the book, because if there's one thing I love, it's trying to cast actors and actresses in movie adaptations of books I just read.

So I figured I'd compare and contrast who I have in my head for these characters and who Steven Luna had cast in the same roles and see what pans out.

Joe Vampire

Who Steven Chose: Joseph Gordon Levitt
Who I'd Choose: Jay Baruchel
Compare and Contrast: Don't get me wrong, I love me some Levitt and will cast him in just about everything, but I think this part requires a bit more of a schlubby every man. And after much deliberation, Jay occurred to me as that type of guy. I mean, he's Jewish, kind of plain but still utterly cute and adorable in his own way. For some reason as I was reading this, I had Ed Helms stuck in my head for this role, but when I realized the character was a bit younger, Jay Baruchel seemed like a logical fit. Just use his character in She's Out of Your League for the template and boom, instant Joe.

Chloe

Who Steven Chose: Natalie Portman
Who I'd Choose: Katie Cassidy
Compare and Contrast: As Steven puts it, Chloe, as written is loosely defined. Esthetically she's just defined as a pretty girl. And Natalie Portman is a pretty girl, don't get me wrong, but she seems either too much of something or not enough of something else to really be Chloe in my head. But for some reason, Katie Cassidy popped up in my head when reading her. She's pretty in all the right ways but I think she'd got the mentality to play Chloe better. It must be the Supernatural connection, but I think she's a great fit.

Hube

Who Steven Chose: Andrew Garfield
Who I'd Choose: Andrew Garfield
Compare and Contrast: I really didn't have anybody envisioned for the role while reading it. I just couldn't quite picture him. Then I read Steven's idea and honestly, it's a pretty decent fit. Garfield would make a great Hube. Also Jesse Eisenberg would be a close second.

Lazer

Who Steven Chose: James McAvoy
Who I'd Choose: Charlie Hunnam
Compare and Contrast: I love James McAvoy and have since probably Penelope, but he's not right for this part. I mean, be honest with yourself, who could you imagine getting a BJ from an elderly mouth hooker with more pizazz? McAvoy or Hunnam. I think Hunnam could throw himself into that role with glee. Also, I think Hunnam would look better in leather pants.

Louise

Who Steven Chose: Dianne Wiest
Who I'd Choose: Catherine O'hara
Compare and Contrast: Ok, at different times, I had about three different women cast in this role, the other two being Edie McClurg and Christine Willes, but Catherine O'hara won out, barely. I think it's the Beetlejuice connection, but O'hara seems perfectly suited to be a stately vampire of certain age. Dianne Wiest seems way too motherly for the job. Not that the role of Louise isn't motherly, but it's motherly from further away. There's always this professional distance between Louise and Joe and I think someone with a little more ice in her veins (Ha!) would be suited for the job. Although I'd still love McClurg in the role. Just picture McClurg with Vampire Fangs and tell me that wouldn't be an amazing casting choice. 

Nurse PonyPants

Who Steven Chose: Melissa McCarthy
Who I'd Choose: Melissa McCarthy
No compare and contrast needed. That character as written was a crack-up for the five seconds she was in the book and who better to walk in, chew some scenery and then walk out gloriously than Melissa McCarthy. If you need any further proof, I direct you to her cameo in GO as exhibits A-Z.

Megan

Who Steven Chose: Keira Knightly
Who I'd Choose: Mila Kunis
Compare and Contrast: I think Kunis is more prepared to go flirty and off-kilter than Keira is. Keira is little too cookie cutter for me. I mean, was I the only one who saw Domino? She's not as edgy and quirky as she thinks.

Bo

Who Steven Chose: John C. Reilly
Who I'd Choose: Danny McBride
Compare and Contrast: Really it's a wash. Both would be pretty damn good for the part, but I think McBride is little more southern-fried and physical for the role.

Lucas

Who Steven Chose: Ryan Gosling
Who I'd Chose: Ryan Gosling
I hadn't really envisioned Lucas, but Ryan is a pretty good fit. He can go from charming to menacing in 0.38 seconds and this character does just that. The only thing I'm having trouble with is imagining Ryan in pseudo-Duran Duran get up. Not that he was in the get-up in the book, but that was one of the character quirks listed in the book, so I think it has to be there in the movie in some capacity.

Don

He wasn't mentioned in Steven's casting, and he was barely in the book, but he's still and interesting role to try and cast.  He was such an odd, disheveled, lost character that he'd be so much fun to cast. Something about him reminded me of Richard Edson in his old school Ferris Bueller days, for some reason. But when I really thought about it, I think Ben Foster would be perfect for the part. Think about it. He plays really good screwed up characters and I think he could play sexually ambiguous enough to try and sway Joe Vampire into the dark side after one too many Sake Bombs. Just saying.

Well there you have it. Let the controversy commence.