Friday, March 09, 2007

Religion, Politics, and Tarantino: Redux

So you remember that handy-dandy guide I made regarding discussing all things Tarantino? I thought of another rule yesterday which I feel bares mentioning:

13. Try to not get too indignant when someone states they've only seen Pulp Fiction once, like a bajillion years ago, and they don't remember too much of it.Your reaction to that statement shouldn't be "You haven't seen that movie a thousand times?!?!?! You don't have it memorized and can recite it in its entirety on command?!?!?! What!?!?! We so totally can not be friends. I heretofore totally deny you're exsistence." A much as you'd like to react thusly, you should keep such thoughts to yourself. It's not your fault there are some poor pitiable people who don't get the genius of Zed being dead. You shouldn't stick your nose up at them. Instead, you should pity them from a distance and wonder what this world is coming to.

I guess I should explain this one a little bit. Yesterday I got my hair cut. It's usually not a big ordeal. I love my hair stylist. Sabrina is excellent and if you're ever in Redwood Shores and you need a sassy cut, I recommend her highly. I go in every 8 weeks with natty ends and frizzy hair, I gab with her for an hour, I come out looking smoking. It rocks. But somehow yesterday turned into a 'situation'. A hair stylist dilema let's say. Not a full blown fiasco, but an event nonetheless. I'll get to that later. Long story short, I didn't get to see Sabrina. I got handed over to another stylist instead. I wasn't exactly happy with it, especially because I could see Sabrina, punky hair, tattoos and all, not ten feet from me, coloring somebody else's hair and she wasn't going to cut my HAIR. Grrr. But I tried to make the best of it. It went o.k. for the most part. Then we started talking about movies and the genius of Black Snake Moan. "Hello Justin Timberlake." (Her sentiments, not mine). Then I made the mistake of trying to explain the whole Jules/Lazerus theory Fighting Nun had and she gave me a blank stare. She'd only seen Pulp Fiction once, like forever and a day ago, and she really doesn't remember it that well! What!?!?! Really!?!?! I mean, it's Pulp Fiction!?!? Pulp. Fiction. Pulp "What does Marcellus Wallace look like?" Fiction!!! How did you only see it once?!?!?! Jesus.

And, o.k., it's not like I couldn't understand only seeing it once, like ten years ago. The first time I tried to watch Pulp Fiction, I didn't understand it. I was an impressionable college freshman at the time and there were just certain things I wasn't ready for, the needle to the heart sequence being one of them. That first time I was like "There's a lot of things I'll do for Eric Stoltz, but sitting through this scene? Not one of them." and I was out. Like walked out of the theater out. It didn't help that Christopher Walken's famous Watch Monologue was the next scene. Couldn't handle it. Couldn't. And about 2 months later, I watched the ending all "I'm not going to dig it... but fine, second chance here we go." And then... "It's the wallet that says Badass ...." And then I was like "Oh, I get it now, heh." My issues with needle to the heart aside, the movie effing rocks!!!

But not everybody sees it my way. Just like not everybody *cough Fighting Nun cough* understands the awesomeness of The Sandlot, which I realized last night that even after not seeing it in like five years I still have memorized. "I take that back boy. You're not in trouble. You're dead where you stand." James Earl Jones killed it. 'Nuff said. Back to the point. I should probably let this one slide. And I think I did a good job of tempering the indignation at her statement, but sadly I didn't have much else to say after that. "So Black Snake Moan, yeah (trail off to silence)...." It's Pulp Fiction!!! I'm not sure where it stands in the pantheon of pivotal cultural moments, but its pretty high up there!! It's significant!!! Watch it again so we might have something else to talk about. Oh, and learn who Stephen Dorff is!!! Yes, I realize that's partly my fault. When asked what he's been in I could only recall like two movies. Where I could usually rattle off like a ton of movies, I was all "Uh.. He was in Blade and stuff." Blade was the best I could come up with. I couldn't think of Backbeat, Cecil B. Demented, nothing. Blade and Alone in the Dark were it. Oh, and I think I mentioned Feardotcom. (Snerk.) Come on brain!!! You're better than that. At least mention the Aerosmith video where Alicia Silverstone bungies from her belly button ring!!! What's wrong with you. Stoopid brain.

So yeah, I guess the rule goes like this: For all the poor bastards who haven't seen Pulp Fiction a bajillion times, rent it and give it at least two good run throughs to try and soak in some of its genius. For the rest of us who bask in Pulp Fiction's genius, let's try and not be too hard on the rest of them.

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